Since we've started the journey toward parenthood, making plans has become a real pain in the ass.
When we had the first miscarriage, we learned the hard way that making plans too early can end up feeling like a sucker punch to the gut. Since then, we've learned that fertility treatments look at your plans and collapse giggling on the floor. You want to go on vacation when? Hahahahahahah. Oh, sorry. Too bad those tickets were non-refundable. Guess United Airlines made a few bucks off you, huh?
I've already missed a reunion of some dear college friends because we were maybe possibly going to start an IUI cycle right around then. In January, my brother and his family went to Arizona to surprise my Dad for his birthday. We wanted to go, but I ended up having a date with the dildocam that weekend.
There are lots of exciting things on the calendar this spring and summer, all with multiple question marks around them. Some are small trips to see friends and family. Other plans are considerably more involved. One requires international travel. Two others are extended camping trips in inhospitable settings.
If I am pregnant, I might feel like crap. Or I might be advised to avoid the long travel and camping trips, given my history of miscarriage. If I'm not, our plans may be in the middle of another IVF cycle. And we may be stretched a little thin, resources-wise. It's a little daunting, to say the least.
On the other hand, maybe this is just the experience I need to one day become a maestro of soccer practices, violin lessons, slumber parties, band camp, PTA meetings, and the occasional grownup dinner party.