Monday, April 30, 2007

Wobbling Back To Center

Everyone says it's early to see a heartbeat.

Sensible Friend, earning her moniker once again, remarked "Well, if it measured 6 weeks and one day, do you think something went horribly wrong in the ten minutes before your appointment? If it's growing, it's ok."

My mom's GP made another brilliant deduction: "The NP saw 'fetal heart movement.' What do you think that was if it wasn't a heartbeat?"

And I still feel crappy, tired, and nauseated.

So I decided that going back to radiology for another ultrasound tomorrow was not worth the stress. If this pregnancy isn't going to work out, we'll know soon enough. I called back and told them we're not coming tomorrow. We'll try again next week. In the meanwhile, I'm going to try to resist the tendency to freak out and assume the worst. In other words, we're still in the game, and this might actually be our baby.

I'm proud of myself for recognizing my reactions and cancelling that appointment. I may get thrown off kilter easily, but I also seem to have inherited a certain Weeble-like quality from my dad. I wobble, but I don't fall down. At least not all the time.


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The Town Criers said...

You know what--it's okay to be neurotic. This is your child that we're talking about. And you are a Mama Bear protecting that child. And you know rationally that you can't do anything at this point beyond worry. Once the baby is out, there will be 1000 things you can do for him/her. But right now, the only thing you can do is worry on his/her behalf.

I hope at the u/s next week, you see a healthy heartbeat. That it was simply too early this week.

Anonymous said...

I totally agree. I f she said your guy measured 6 weeks, one day, and your in your sixth week, then the little guy is right on schedule. You're still in the game.

Pamela Jeanne said...

I'm sorry I'm late in commenting here. After reading your posts it's completely understandable why you're wobbly. I admire your courage and hope that you can find some peace in the meantime...

Chris said...

I'm new to your blog but wanted to stop and wish you all of the very best this time around.